Too Much To Do

We had a random beautiful day on Saturday and it was the perfect time to get started on that huge pile of wood chips.  In a house with two young kids, this project that could be a weekend event, can take weeks to accomplish.  So we were determined to get the kids in the yard and start working.  Usually, this is not an issue as they love to play outside.  But today, for some reason, they seemed to have a constant stream of needs that required one parent to go inside over and over and eventually stay inside.  Rodney, my husband, took that on as he knew I needed the fresh air and work.  This sudden change in our income was wearing on me and I needed to be active.

So I took it on.  And at hour 2 of this project, it became clear I was going to be doing it all day just to get the planting beds in the front yard complete.  I managed to get them all weeded, sheet mulched and covered in 4 inches of wood chips.  This required pushing the wheelbarrow up a ramp over our front steps.  I found myself grunting like a Wimbledon champ by the end.

But at that 2 hour mark, I thought..."this is A LOT of work for plants that are not going to feed us!  As I've said before, without a massive amount of time, I have lists of things that get re-organized regularly.  I felt like this beautiful Saturday with the kids occupied was being wasted on plants that were only filling space.  Now, I enjoy the blooms, watching them grow, seeing how they soften the edges of our lawn, smell, bring birds and bees.  But I realized I had made a switch.

I'm starting to think differently about our space as well as our things.  What purpose does this have?  How will our lives be better served by it?  The same goes for the lawn.  As I make more and more plans for the bigger garden this year, I keep thinking of the lawn.  Which part of the lawn is used the least?  Am I ready to let it go?  I'm definitely ready to let go of mowing.  Except for the grass clippings for the compost, I don't have any attachment to a grassy lawn.

But I don't want to spend several more weekends digging up turf and tilling the soil and spending a bunch of money on tons of compost and time and muscle ache on blending them together in preparation for a garden.  I keep doing more and more research on the straw bale gardening and I'm thinking its the perfect solution for me this year.  I can place the bales, still tied, around the garden area.  Put a layer of compost on the top, plant into the compost.  Then as the straw bale is composting over the year, it not only provides the nutrients needed for this year's plants but it kills the grass underneath AND builds up the nutrients in the soil below.  So next year's garden will have fantastic soil without all the work!!

Lady and Tess working the ground

And this leads to all the stuff swirling in my head since Rodney lost his job.  I know that I need to bring in some income as well in order for him to have the opportunity to find work that is meaningful to him.  And yet, I have all kinds of beliefs growing like weeds in my head.  Weeds that need to be removed.  Long, established lawn that is no longer serving me.  I know I've set up lawn chairs, maybe even a hammock on that lawn and allowed myself to settle in to some of those beliefs.  Get comfy there.  But they are no longer serving me.

I've been reading a couple books recently that are helping me take these new challenges on in a different way.  Living your Bliss by Terri Cole-Whitaker and The Power of Intention by Dr. Wayne Dyer are guiding me in this straw bale gardening of the mind.  When I let go of the limiting beliefs and just allow myself to be connected to the greater power and energy around, the good stuff will grow.  It has too because the environment is right.  There are no blockages.  Plants will grow because they have too.  That's what they are meant to do.  They don't grow when something is blocking them or making them sick.  But if those barriers are not there, the plant thrives.

So this week's mission is to pull those weeds, let those thoughts and beliefs go. I'm focusing on ease and efficiency.  That means, stop making my life harder by thinking those limiting thoughts.  Or at least trying to stop those thoughts.